Racy Stacy: Virginity in college

Racy Stacy, Herald Reporter

Hello Hawks! It’s the last issue of the semester, which means this will be my final Racy Stacy column. I am so sad that my time as Racy is coming to an end, but I fully believe that this column will continue next year and will hopefully benefit next year’s students. 

For the final week, I’m going to be writing about being a virgin in college. While I’m personally not a virgin, I have several friends at school who are and I’d like to address the negative stereotype that surrounds being a virgin in college. 

If you’ve ever watched movies like “Mean Girls” or “Sixteen Candles” you know that there’s a pretty clear message that emphasizes the pressure girls and guys face to lose their virginities.

I don’t regret losing my virginity to who I did and I am personally glad I waited for the right person to come along. I went through a few boyfriends in high school before giving up my virginity to my then-boyfriend in my senior year of high school and I don’t regret my decision to wait. However, I’m not going to tell you that waiting for the right person is what you should do. If you want to have sex and get it over with, go for it. There is no “right way” to do it. What you want and feel most comfortable doing is the only thing that matters. 

A 21-year-old student at RWU says being a virgin “has it’s ups and downs,” but is confident in her decision to wait to have sex until she finds someone worthy. 

“It’s really hard to find a genuine guy who really cares about you and wants to start something with you,” she said. “It’s rare to find, but it’s a good thing when you find them.” 

Having sex for the first time is a big deal and can be really scary for some people. There are a lot of unknowns and it’s impossible to know exactly what to expect because everyone is different. 

Even now that I’ve had sex more than a few times, I still consider it to be a very intimate thing and I take it seriously. I’m no angel and I’ll admit that I’ve had my moments where I’m not entirely sure if the person I’m sleeping with has good intentions. But I will say that whether you’re a guy or a girl, you shouldn’t feel pressured to lose your virginity because you’re older. You never have to feel ashamed and you get to decide when to have sex on your own terms.

If you are still a virgin, there are a couple things to keep in mind for when you do decide to have sex for the first time. The first is to take it slow  — be patient with each other and take your time. You’ll probably be pretty nervous, so using lube or taking a little extra time to fool around before having sex isn’t a bad idea. 

Another piece of advice given by the anonymous student: “Stand your ground and be you.” 

“Don’t just give it up to someone just because you don’t want to be a virgin in college. If you’re still a virgin, it’s for a reason and it’s probably because you want to find someone who cares.” 

 

Thank you so much for reading my column this year. I hope you enjoyed it! Until next time, Hawks!