When Popeyes debuted their now-famous fried chicken sandwich on August 12, America went crazy for it like a new Travis Scott album. 

The sandwich immediately took over social media, being praised as the best chicken sandwich of all time. It even ignited a Twitter war between the Popeyes Chicken and Chick-Fil-A corporate accounts, which ended in an absolute slaughter of Chick-Fil-A’s chicken sandwich reputation. 

I didn’t believe the hype of the Popeyes chicken sandwich at first. I mean, it’s a chicken sandwich from a fast food restaurant. How good could it really be? 

That is the question that set me on my quest. I became determined to find the best chicken sandwich in America. The rules: the sandwich could consist of only the bread, chicken, condiments and pickles if they were part of the sandwich by default. After all, this is a chicken sandwich ranking, not a tomato and lettuce ranking. 

The criteria of my judgment included quality of the meat, crispiness of the first bite, toastiness of the bread, meat-to-bread ratio and ability to last over time, so it would be possible to eat the leftovers if you get home drunk at 4 a.m., if you’re 21 or older. After considering all these factors, I gave the sandwich an overall score out of 10. 

I narrowed down the top five best chicken sandwiches I have ever found at a relatively low price. At number five, there’s the Burger King Crispy Chicken Sandwich. 

Listed at $5.99 on the menu, this sandwich strikes me as inviting. The crispiness of the chicken itself at the first bite is superb. However, the meat of the chicken itself is flat and lacks body, like day-old roadkill. Not to mention, the meat-to-bread ratio was way off, resulting in my third bite being just bread. I gave the sandwich an overall score of 7.5. 

Next is the $4.99 Chick-Fil-A Original Chicken Sandwich at number four. The meat of the sandwich itself has a good amount of thickness and is juicy, and the bread has a nice subtle crunch to it. But the taste of the actual meat itself gives off an indescribably bad vibe. It’s like the chicken whose meat it’s made from was miserable and died in vain and now it’s glad that its sandwich is making you fat. Also, didn’t sit well overnight. I gave this sandwich an 8. 

Kentucky Fried Chicken’s Crispy Colonel Sandwich ranks at number three. Priced at $5.49, the meat of the sandwich is amazing, truly. The thickness and the crunch of that nutrient-filled deep fried shell hits the spot every time. Its fatal flaw: too much mayonnaise. It dripped out while I was eating the sandwich, making it look like it was crying tears of greasy sadness at its delicious demise. Its score: 8.5. 

The unsurprising runner-up is Buffalo Wild Wings’ Southern Chicken Sandwich, minus the cheese and slaw. With a uniquely seasoned batter, this sandwich really hits different. The most expensive of the bunch at $11.49, it’s served with a bacon aioli on a challah bun with house pickles, all of which age perfectly overnight. When you bite into it, even hours later, it’s still crispy. This sandwich is boyfriend material. Final score: 9.5. 

And lastly, the hero of our story: Popeyes’ Chicken Sandwich, at $3.99. This sandwich is quite simply perfect on all counts. It is the epitome of all things good. Personally, I would marry it. Not only will the Popeyes chicken sandwich do your laundry, it will fold it too. When you order it, Ellen DeGeneres appears and congratulates you on your best life choice to date. I feel confident admitting that I would give my life for it. It’s no wonder there’s been a nation-wide shortage of them for almost a month now. Final score: 69.